WINNING!!

OMG! Sooooo embarrassing! We announced the winner of our online competition yesterday for the Tropicalilly Range Promotion and it was ME!! I couldn’t believe it, because I haven’t really paid much attention to the competition and I didn’t really do many of the clues myself coz it means wasting hours on fb and twitter and basically I couldn’t be bothered and anyway I can never understand the kryptonic questions or work out the stupid answers. Fortunately, there’s this nerdy feral whose our Head of Contextual Content and Ideas Creation (we just call him Head of Con) and he keeps asking me to do him all these favours like getting my Mum to get everyone at Yagoona Texan Poker Night to “like” our clients fb home pages, coz it helps him get our unique user numbers up, which is what the Client wants. In return Nerdy helps me out with solving the clues, which, after all, he’s pretty good at seeing as he wrote most of them in the first place. I thought he was joking the other day when he said “Hey Inga, wouldn’t it be awesome if you and me were joint winners and got to spend a week together on a tropical island? We’d have to share a bed!” Everybody in the creative department burst out laughing (except the random digital ones who all work with their headphones on) but I thought it was a really creepy comment seeing as how he’s just returned from his honeymoon in some fierce James Bond castle on a lake in Italy and also coz his new wife used to be one of my BFF’s (until she got hammered one night and told me she thought I had chubby fingers – as if!!) Anyway, talk about psychic! That’s exactly what happened! Nerdy and I are joint winners and are heading off to spend a week together in a private hideaway beach resort somewhere on a secret island in the Whitsundays! His new wifey’s gone absolutely mental and apparently she threw this massive tantrum and chucked his entire Collector's Edition of The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim in the recycling bin, which he’s furious about coz it was personally signed by Todd Howard’s Animation Assistant but now its going to be melted down and turned into something else altogether. Everyone in the agency started whining about how the whole competition had been rigged, which is soooo stupid coz if any of them had had any brains whatsoever they’d have done exactly what I did. After all, that’s what these competitions are all about – proving your intelligence. But then all these bogans on twitter started going blah blah blah that they’d been totes ripped off and how unfair it was that two people from the ad agency had won the competition and next thing you know that hectic dude at mumbrella who’s always trying to chat me up at award shows is suddenly on the phone telling me he’s running a piece that says “Suit Wins Own Online Shampoo Promo” and I got really angry and pointed out that I am not just any old “suit” but I'm the Senior Account Director on the entire Haircare and Body Lotions category and if he's going to write an article about me then he should at least get my title right!